


Avengers Whumptober 2019

by Nanerich



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Depression, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Panic, Poisoning, Whumptober, Whumptober 2019, anxiety attack, baby science bros, if there are important things I forgot to tag please let me know!, putting my darling's through hell, sorry I'm really bad at tagging, stabwounds, suicidal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-17
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2020-12-21 02:44:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21067502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nanerich/pseuds/Nanerich
Summary: Pretty self-explanatory title; each chapter is one prompt-turned-oneshot about an Avenger, seperate from the other chapters.Chapter one is the table of contents with the prompt and the character that is being whumped.Tags and Characterlist will expand as chapters are added (if chapters are added, since the new semester started I'm a little busy doing studying and stuff)Hope you like it! :)





	1. Table of Contents

1 - Shaky Hands

It's the 13th anniversary of Richard and Mary Parker's death. And on that exact day, Tony and Pepper are flying across the country.

2 - Explosion

Tony invites the Baby Science Bros to come and work with him on a suit that got damaged during a fight. And everything goes well, until Peter's spider sense goes off.

3 - Delirium

When Bucky wakes up in the morning, he can tell that something's wrong. It must have happened, Hydra finally got to him.

4 - Human Shield

Fighting alien birds with your fellow Asgardians is already bad enough. If they can shoot poison arrows, it is even worse. But what trumps it all, is if your older brother decides to dive in to shield you.

5 - Gunpoint

Never before did Peter have to talk somebody down from taking their own life. What makes it so many times worse, is that he's currently trying to safe his classmate.

6 - Dragged Away

Ever since Loki managed to get Bruce to hulk out on the helicarrier, the scene of Hulk dragging her to obviously her death plagues Natasha's dreams.

7 - Isolation

Who says that Isolation's bad? Bucky definitely prefers it to having to be social around the Avengers...

8 - Stabwound

Steve hated Aliens. Especially the kind that rammed their swords through his side.

9 - "Don't Move!"

When it comes to Clint, Nat just can't help but think with her emotions. It might be a good thing though, because if she weren't batshit insane, her plan to save him probably never would work...

10 - "Asphyxiation!"

“You're losing your touch there, old man”, Nat observed, as Clint managed to drop Steve on his behind with barely breaking a sweat.

“She's right”, Clint agreed, “this was way to easy. You alright?”

“I don't get sick.” Steve took the outstretched hand puling him to his feet. “Super Soldier, remember?” Admittedly, he had felt a little off all day, everything seemed to be a bit slower his movements, his breathing... Come to thing of it, especially his breathing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Today is the 13th anniversary of Mary and Richard Parker's death. And on that exact date, Tony and Pepper, who have become like family to Peter, fly across the entire country.

Peter took a small break from patrolling and let his feet dangle off a rooftop, his thoughts drifting towards the upcoming weekend. Tony had invited Peter to join him and Pepper on a trip to California; he was invited to Disneyland's opening of a new Ironman-themed interactive ride. Peter wasn't sure what exactly that meant, but he was excited to find out. Or he would be, if it weren't this weekend. Any other time he'd fly around the world, but not this Friday; any day but Friday. He... he couldn't, he just couldn't think about that day without his hands shaking like crazy, his lungs constricting and a wave of panic just hitting him straight on.

Peter couldn't go and he couldn't let Mr Stark, his Irondad, leave. Mr Stark never really asked Peter if he wanted to join, pretty much just assumed – in all fairness correctly – that Peter would want to come along to Disneyland and just plainly told Peter when they'd pick him up.

But it just ate him up leaving him only one real option. “KAREN, can you please call Mr Stark?”

“Calling him now.”

He picked up pretty much right away. “Hey kid, what's up?”

“Hey Mr Stark.” No time for pleasantries or small-talk, he needed to get it out right away. “I'm sorry but I can't come along this weekend.”

“Oh.” It was silent on the other side for a while, before Tony spoke again. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah.” Peter tried his best to sound calm. “It's just... There's so much going on right now, you know?” Well, Peter was pretty sure that Tony would not buy that.

“Don't you think a weekend away might be good? To take the stress off.”

“Yeah, it's just, May is off work and...”

“She can come, too!”, Tony threw in, “the more, the merrier.”

“No.” Damn, he answered a little to quickly and harshly to sound nonchalant... But he couldn't have May in an air plane this weekend. “I mean, it's a nice offer, but thanks”, Peter tried to safe it.

“Alright then.” Tony sounded really taken aback. “Is there something I can do to help you out?”

_Don't get into your airplane this weekend, just stay in New York, just one day longer at least! Please, just stay somewhere I can keep tabs on you!_

It wasn't fair for Peter to ask this, though, he shouldn't take his anxieties out on Tony. “That's really nice to offer, but I'm alright. Really”, Peter added emphatically and not very truthfully.

“Call me if that changes, ok?”

“I will.”

Man, this was awkward. Peter was sure, Tony knew that he wasn't getting the whole story, but again Tony wasn't his therapist.

Mr Stark was the one to break the tense silence. “Ok, kiddo, talk to you soon. Take care, alright?”

“Yeah, you too. Enjoy Disney.”

“I will. Bye, kid.”

“Bye, Mr Stark.”

“Call ended.”

“Thanks, KAREN.”

***

**MJ<3: ** Hey Peter, if you need or want to talk call me, I'll be right there

**MJ<3: ** I love you, nerd.

**Peter: ** I love you, too :*

***

**Ned: ** Hey man, just FYI: guy-in-a-chair duties do extend to being there for your civilian personality...

**Peter: ** Thanks, man :)

***

Even waking up to those sweet messages from his friends didn't really help to start this day in a more or less nice way. Especially since right now, Tony and Pepper, who Peter had gotten so close to, who became like another set of parental figures for him, got into an air plane. And all that 13 years after his parents flew away, promising Peter they'd be back home soon, on the day.

It was horrible; as hard as he tried, he barely remembered his parents. If Peter was honest, if it weren't for the pictures he wasn't sure he'd even remember what they looked like.

Shit, Peter was really horrible, wasn't he? They were his parents! And even though he couldn't remember them, he still mourned them! What the fuck was wrong with him? And now his hands started shaking. Oh, that was just a panic attack in the making. Shit.

And now his lungs started to constrict, great. Peter clawed into his blanket, as well as his shaky hands let him, trying to steady himself, to ground himself. So, he was gonna lose the next set of parents today; crashing in a fucking air plane, because of some stupid Disneyland attraction?

Oh, Peter was gonna be sick.

“May?” He tried to call out for his aunt, but it only came out as a hoarse whisper. “May?”, he tried again, but she didn't hear him. No one heard him, everybody around him disappeared, maybe he didn't deserve to have a family? Probably, there was no other reason why parent after parent died...

It was all his fault, it was all Peter's fault! He didn't safe Uncle Ben, now he just let Tony and Pepper into their plane, let them crash? Shit, shit, shit. Peter scrambled to his feet, his knees barely keeping him in place, keep him upright and he staggered to the door. He couldn't breathe; pain, worry, fear constricted his chest. He stumbled against the door, scrambling to find the handle and basically fell into the living room once he found it.

“Peter!”

He just curled himself up on the ground, made himself as small as he could. Maybe the world could just end, turn everything dark like the deep sea; everything would just wash away and Peter could just float, weightless in nothingness. But, as the hands grabbing his shoulders reminded him, it wasn't his reality.

“Come on kid, everything's alright.” This wasn't May... The hands pulled him up and towards the couch, before cupping his face. “Peter, it's alright, it's me, Tony.”

That couldn't be right... Tony was somewhere between here and LA right now, crashing to his death... Maybe, Peter just had to roll with it, get to tell Tony what he needed him to know. “Don't leave”, he just whispered, “please, don't go.” He all but fell over into his chest and wrapped his arms around Tony as tightly as he could.

“Don't worry, kid.” Pete got pulled in close. “I'm not leaving you.”

And then he pressed a kiss on Peter's head. Huh, that felt very real. Peter leaned back a bit, still shaking, trembling and looked up at the man, who was very much not dead and very much not on his way to Anaheim either. “Mr Stark?”

“The one and only”, he grinned.

“You're here.”

“I am”, the man smiled.

“Huh.” Peter wasn't really sure how to process all this; his brain was being slightly mushy and confused right now. “Alright.” Rolling with it was probably the best thing to do right now.

“Now, how about we get some breakfast? Your aunt's pancakes smell amazing.”

Slowly but surely, his surroundings started to piece themselves together. He looked around, seeing May and Pepper leaning against the wall. “Come on”, his aunt smiled. Still a little confused as to what exactly was going on, Peter let him be pulled up and pushed towards the table.

At some point during the breakfast conversation, it finally clicked. After their phone call, Mr Stark apparently hit up May to find out what's wrong with Peter and, on finding out about the anniversary, he had cancelled their trip.

“You didn't have to do that...”

“Yeah, we did. More than that, I wanted to. Besides, it would be so much more fun if it were all of us”, Tony grinned. “And we can still go, eventually, when and if you want.”

Peter smiled up at his mentor. “Yeah, I'd really like that.”

“Great. So, how about we clean this up and then you can tell us all about your parents?”

“Yeah”, Peter nodded and, even though his hands were still shaking a bit, he had already felt so much better than only an hour ago. “Let's do that.”


	3. Explosion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony invited the Baby Science Bros to his lab, so they could work on a suit together. And everything is well, until Peter's spider sense goes off.

Oh, why the hell did Tony do this to himself? Why in the name of Peggy Carter did he invite the baby-science-bros, as the Avengers called them, into his lab? Of course, Peter was over the moon that Ned, Harley and Shuri worked with them; he's been giddy and excited ever since he and Ned had gotten to the compound and it only got worse, when Okoye dropped off Shuri and Harley drove up.

“Wena, it has been too long”, the princess greeted everybody, put her arm around Peter and grinned at the other girls.

“Hey, mechanic, I'm stoked that we're all here, but I think five people working on a potatogun seems a little overkill”, Harley observed, after Tony finally got the kids into the lab. It was in all honesty like herding pigeons...

“Then it's good that we have another project to work on. Mark VIII.”

“Seriously?” Ned's face dropped and he stared at Tony with wide open eyes. “We're gonna work on an actual Ironman-suit?”

“You can thank him for that.” Tony nodded into Peter's direction, who immediately turned bright red.

The other teens turned to look at him, clearly expecting an explanation. Eventually, Peter cleared his throat and began to speak: “So, there might have been a little incident the other day, where Spidey and Ironman fought some weapons-dealer, and it might have gone a little sideways...”

“That's some bull”, Tony made clear. “First of all, we didn't fight together, I had to come save your ass. And 'a little sideways'? You blew up a freaking EMP and fried my suit.”

“I mean, technically, I wasn't the one who blew up the EMP”, Peter tried to defend himself, “but I do take responsibility.”

“Oh, Peter”, Shuri laughed, shaking her head, infecting the two boys who started giggling, too.

“Ok, we've all established that I'm an idiot, can we get to work?”

And work they did; very successfully. As much as the teens riled each other up, they were one smart bunch and it didn't take the group long to find the right rhythm to work in, and before long they were joking and laughing, as they assembled the suit.

Until it all went wrong.

Peter stilled so suddenly, Harley almost walked into him. His face went completely blank and his eyes went wide and shit, that looked like his early-warning-system.

“Peter? What is it?”

And all of a sudden, everything happened at once. “GET DOWN!”, Peter cried out and jumped up on the ceiling, punching a hole through the sky light and glass started raining down on them.

The teens stood like frozen and in one movement, Tony jumped over and pushed the kids behind and under a table. The last thing he saw before he too ducked down, was Peter shooting a web at the suit and flinging it out of the whole in the skylight. And no time too soon.

A loud bang left Tony's ears ringing, as the suit exploded. He tried to keep the kids somehow covered underneath him, wrapping his arms firmly around the three. Ned had let out a loud cry, when the suit went up and Harley pressed himself tightly against the mechanic. Shuri, who unfortunately had her fair share of dangerous situations such as this, kept also close to Tony, but shielded herself well enough.

And then everything went silent again. Tony dared to glance through an eye, not that he could see much, there was dust and rubble everywhere, and where moments ago there was a ceiling, was now only a big gaping hole. Shit.

“PETER!”, he yelled, jumping up from behind the table. “PETE!”

“'m here.” The voice was quiet but steady enough. Tony had to search a moment, until he found the kid, pinned down under a piece of rock and what used to be a shelf.

That was when the door burst open and half the Avengers stormed into the lab. “What is going on?”

“Little help?”, Tony called over. He was strong, but that boulder on Peter's leg was too big for Tony to move by himself, and Peter was in no constitution to do any of the heavy lifting. Thankfully, Steve, the super soldier, managed without too much off a hassle.

“Guys, you take them to the medbay.” He gestured at the three teens, looking at the man with wide, unblinking eyes, their skin as pale as the walls used to be and probably on the verge of either fainting or having a panic attack. “And somebody call Bruce. Steve, help me with Pete.” Together, they heaved the shelf off the kid's torso and managed to get him sort of on his feet; each of them supporting one side and more carrying him than anything else.

“'m alright”, Peter repeated over and over again, but Tony was pretty damn sure that if only one of them were to let go, the kid'd drop to the floor like a bag of potatoes.

“I know you are”, Tony just answered, “we're not helping you, but you're helping Captain America over here. Dude is over a hundred, it's like helping an elderly lady over the street.”

“Huh.” Peter turned to Steve. “You're welcome.” Shit, the kid was really out of it.

“Thank you, Peter”, Rogers smiled, “you really are the kindest Avenger out there.”

“Sssssh”, he hissed, “issa secret! No one can know I'm Spi-Man!”

“Don't worry, I don't think anyone heard us”, Steve assured him before shooting Tony a worried look.

When they got to the medbay, Bruce was already there and immediately turned all his attention on Peter. “Heya there kid, playing hero, huh?” He took Tony's place by Peter's side, and with Steve they walked into a separate room. Bruce could handle a broken child and Tony left Peter with the doc and sat himself on an unoccupied patient bed.

The other three seemed to look a little better; some colour had returned to their faces. Sam was currently doing some breathing exercises with them and helped them calm back down. Good. Very good.

It's not like anything too bad had happened, right? These kids just almost blew up, all of them came one Spidey-sense close to dying in his lab. But they were alright, well, almost... Peter would soon enough swing around town again though and all the kids were looked after and there was nothing to worry about anymore. Besides, this wasn’t the first time he witnessed an explosion and it was also not the first time his home blew up. Why then did Tony's anxiety skyrocket right now? He felt his chest restricting, felt his stomach turning and just grabbed onto the mattress, tried holding on until he got through this.

“Hey darling.” Rhodey sat down next to him and put an arm around Tony's shoulders.

“Honeybear”, he sighed and leaned into the touch, the calming presence of his best friend.

“It's alright to be panicky”, he assured him, “the kids are being looked after, you deserve the same, you know?”

“You're looking after me.” Tony wasn't sure whether he meant it as a question, a statement or a plea.

“I am.”

“Thanks.” And just like that, his anxieties died down, a little at least; enough to function.

The were a mess; all of them had what felt like half the building in their hair, faces, clothes... Tony was pretty sure that some of that had made it into his boxers. It was really a miracle that Peter was the only one who got hurt. Not that he should have gotten hurt, when Tony was responsible and he should be the one in the room next door, but he could divulge his self-blame later.

“Hey, kids?” Not leaving Rhodey's embrace, he called out to them. “You alright?”

“I think so”, Harley answered, still a little pale, but his voice sounded steady enough.

“How about you, Ned?”

He was still a little too caught in the fear and could only nod, turning right away back to Sam, who showed him another way to calm his breathing.

“And you, your majesty?”

“Yebo”, she nodded, “I'm ok. Are you?”

“I will be”, Tony answered honestly and even managed a smile that didn't even feel too forced.

The door flew open and MJ and Pepper hurried into the medbay. Pepper went straight to Tony, cupped his face and he shot her a small smile, trying to convey all the 'I'm ok' he could. MJ stormed over to the teens, before looking around the room. “Where's Peter?” Unable to find her boyfriend, she sounded almost panicky.

“With the doctor right now”, Shuri explained.

“And what are you doing here?” It was just about a whisper, but at least Ned got a few words out.

“If you can work with Ironman, I can work with Rescue”, she shot back and sat down next to her friend.

“What happened?”, Pepper asked, sitting herself on Tony's free side.

“A suit blew up, don't know why yet.” That was all Tony managed to get out, without getting panicky again.

“And why is Peter the one needing medical attention?”, MJ repeated again, a lot more urgent than the first time.

“Because he was a lot closer to that explosions than us”, Harley explained, very bluntly and Tony's stomach just dropped to some very uncomfortable places. Fuck. Peter was the one to save their asses, when it should have been Tony.

He noticed Ned grabbing MJ's hand, trying to lower their anxieties about Peter's state. Sweet gesture, and Tony was incredibly glad that he had Rhodey and Pepper doing the same for him.

Not too long later, Bruce walked back out. “So, Peter has a broken leg, ruptured drum, a now stitched up cut on his hand, bruises all over and definitely a concussion. He's staying here the rest of the day, and should probably stay at the compound the next few days, so I can keep an eye on him.” That sounded worrying. “Don't worry”, Bruce quickly added, when Tony's breathing quickened, “he'll be alright. It's just precaution.”

“Yeah, sure...” Rhodey's grip around him tightened a little and Tony was eternally grateful for his honeybear.

“Can I go to him?”, MJ asked quietly.

“You can, but I gave him something, he's already more asleep than awake.”

“Good enough for me”, she decided, got up and followed Bruce, who gave Tony a quick nod á la 'come along'.

Tony decided to ignore the jelly-like feel of his knees and trotted after the doctor and girl to where Peter was cuddled up in a bed.

“Hey, Peter”, MJ smiled as she walked over to his side.

He looked her up and down. “You look really familiar.”

“I should hope so, I’m your girlfriend!”

“Really? Holy shit”, he mumbled with the widest smile and grabbed her hand.

“Looks like you're doing alright”, Tony commented from the foot end of Peter's bed and patted his leg.

“Yeah”, he answered, not looking away from MJ though, “you're staying, right?”

“Of course”, MJ nodded and pulled a chair up right to his side. “I'm gonna be right here.”

“Thanks”, he muttered, his eyelids dropping as he drifted off into sleep. “Love you.”

“I love you, too”, she whispered back and gently stroked his hand and Tony quietly retreated, not wanting to intrude any more on their moment. And he was clearly not needed. Huh. Well, he could indulge that feeling another time.

“Come on”, Pepper linked their arms, “you need a shower and a hot cup of tea and then you can tell us what exactly happened.”

He did get his shower, but not much more; they had barely gotten into the living room, when May stormed in, followed by Happy. “What the hell happened?”

“Not quite sure yet, to be honest”, Tony shrugged, and with Rhodey and Pepper on each side, he sat himself down; his knees were still not complying the way they were supposed to.

“Tony, why did my phone get a bomb-threat-alert?”

“And where's my kid?”

“Infirmary”, he answered quietly, and May's face just dropped in panic.

“He'll be perfectly alright”, Bruce assured her. “He is concussed, but he's resting up right now. MJ is with him, so is Dr Cho. If you like, I'll show you to him; otherwise Tony was just about to tell us what had happened.”

“Oh fuck”, May sighed and rubbed her eyes. “Alright, talk.”

“The kids and I were fixing a suit that got damaged during a fight last week. Everything was alright, at least I thought so, until Peter's spider-sense went off. He told us to get down, and before I know it, he punches through the ceiling and flings the suit out which then blows up.” Oh, shit, Tony's stomach already turned again; he felt like he was gonna be sick.

Thankfully, Bruce took over. “The teens are more or less in shock, so is Tony. We're lucky to have Sam, who works at the VA and he's currently with the teens in the other room, helping them calm down again.”

May just stood there, frozen to the spot and took a deep breath, before locking eyes with Bruce. “Take me to my nephew, please.”

“Sure thing. Follow me.”

“Yeah, I'm going there, too”, Tony decided and got up, Pepper and Rhodey right behind him.

“Maybe you should calm yourself a little more”, Pep suggested.

“I can do that in the medbay, too.”

“Or”, Rhodey threw in, “you let the kid sleep and look after the three kids that are awake right now and freaking the fuck out.”

He had a point. Peter was gonna sleep all day, anyways. Besides, with May and MJ there, plus the doctors, Tony didn't want to crowd him. “Screw you for always being right”, he grumbled and carefully walked over to the other room, where the three teens sat on a couch together, all three actually smiling. “Well, you guys look like you're doing better”, Tony smiled and made himself comfortable in a chair opposite them.

“Mr Falcon is really good”, Ned praised him.

“Thanks, Ned. But my name is Sam.” At that, the boy blushed. Which was nice, seeing some more colour on the still quite pale face. Instead of talking more with him, Ned turned to Tony. “How is Peter? Is he alright?”

“He's gonna be”, Tony assured him. “I mean, you already know that he's got quite the concussion. But he'll be fine, he just needs a while to heal. Luckily, he's got that spider-metabolism-super-healing-thing, so he'll be back on his feet in no time.” Tony wasn't sure, whether he was actually comforting the teens or himself. It seemed to work better on the kids though, Tony was still not feeling all that much better about the Spiderling in the infirmary.

“Can we go to him?”, Harley asked.

“Not right now. He's asleep anyways, and MJ and May are already there and he shouldn't be too crowded, since until he's healed, his brain can't take too much input. We can check in on him tomorrow. Let’s just enjoy ourselves as well as we can, before your parents never let you come here again.”

“Please”, Harley shot back, “my Mum is happy to have me out the house every once in a while.”

“Besides”, Ned continued, “it wasn’t your fault.”

“It kind of was”, Tony muttered, “I build that thing, I am supposed to know when it’s gonna blow up…”

“Stark, I did not realize something was wrong, and I am smarter than you.”

“She’s right”, Rhodey agreed with Shuri, “she is the most intelligent one.”

“I know that”, Tony moaned, “but come on, my ego!”

As everybody started to giggle, the tension seemed to break somewhat and for the first time in an hour, Tony was almost sure that they would all be alright.

  
  



	4. Delirium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It happened. Hydra caught up with Bucky and there was nothing he could do.

When Bucky woke up, he knew immediately that something was not right. The room he was in was foreign to him and he had no recollection of how he had gotten there.

All in all, it felt like a trap. He knew that he couldn't have hidden himself from Hydra forever; it was only a matter of time before they got to him and Steve... Steve. Where was he?

As quietly as he could, Bucky attached his metal arm and almost silently stepped out of the room into a wide, light-filled hallway.

From the other end, he heard voices, chatting and laughing; from the sound of it there were three men and two women, but no Steve. Bucky inched closer, trying to pick up as many clues as to where he was, but to no avail. Even as Buck was on the other side of the door, what he could make out of the talking didn't make all that much sense to him.

He was outnumbered, one to five. All Buck had was the element of surprise and an undying worry and protective instinct for Steve, and that just had to do. So in one motion, Bucky burst through the door, grabbed whoever was nearest to him and screamed out: “WHERE IS HE?”

“Uhm, Barnes?” The guy in his arms looked up with big eyes. “You alright, buddy?”

“I'm not your buddy”, he hissed, before his tone went loud again: “WHERE IS HE?”

Bucky looked around the group.. The dark-haired woman had her gun pointed at him, so did the guy with the robot arm. The other man looked similarly worried as the blond, Bucky had a tight grasp on. The red-headed woman was the first to speak. “Who is he?”

“Steve Rogers! Where did you take him and what did you do to him?”

“He's out training with Sam like he is every morning.” The ginger took two careful steps towards him. “He's safe and so are you.”

“I don't know what kind of game you're trying to play here”, Buck growled back at her. “I am not leaving until I've got Captain America by my side and every last one of you Hydra-scum is either locked up or six-feet-under.” To proof his point, he tightened his grip around the blond man's neck heard the satisfying sound of somebody gasping for air.

“Alright, alright.” The man in the metal suit raised his hands defensively and motioned for the black-headed woman to lower her gun. “You want Cap? We'll exchange him for Clint there.” He gestured at the man in Bucky's hold.

“You got ten minutes”, Bucky ordered and with a nod the metal man disappeared.

They waited in silence; the redhead tried to talk him down, but a quick punch to who he know knew was called Clint, she shut up again.

The minutes ticked by, when finally the door flew open. “Buck?”

“Steve!” Thank the heavens, he wasn't dead and didn't appear to be hurt either.

“Right, Barnes, here's your Captain, now release Barton.”

He couldn't, though. Steve and him didn't fight and die all these years ago for now to let some Hydra agent go; it was their job to dismantle every last cell of Nazi-scum.

“Buck”, Steve urged him, “let him go.”

“What?” That couldn't be right. “But he's Hydra!”

“No, Bucky, he's a good guy. And a friend.”

And his heart just shattered into a million pieces. They got to Steve; they fucking got to him! The anger just took over. “You sons of bitches!”, he growled. They brainwashed his Steve! Blinded by rage, Bucky started throwing punches as hard as he could. Bucky'd do everything to save his Stevie and if his everything wasn't enough to rescue him, he'd at least damn well avenge him.

So he gave it all he got. But he was too vastly outnumbered and was soon enough pinned down on the ground. After disappearing for a moment, the timid guy showed up again and rammed a needle into Bucky's arm, slowly drowning out all lights and sounds.

They had him. Hydra got their Winter Soldier back.

Just before everything went dark and he passed out, he saw Steve kneeling over him, smiling widely. At least they were in this together.


	5. Human Shield

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fighting alien birds with your fellow Asgardians is already bad enough. If they can shoot poison arrows, it is even worse. But what trumps it all, is if your older brother decides to dive in to shield you.

“Brother, have I told you lately how much you infuriate me?”, Loki groaned, ramming his sword into another Follarian.

“Only three or four times in the last hour”, Thor shot back, before hitting another guy with his lightning.

“And yet we are here. For the love of Frigga, please, just once listen to me, when I tell you not to investigate some seemingly desolate planet.” He came up by his older brother’s side and locked eyes with him for a moment. “Remember, I am the smarter one.”

“You keep saying that”, Thor rolled his eyes before storming through an assembled crowd of Follarians; trying to take out as many warrior birds as he could.

“Because I’m right!”

“Your majesties, please stop the bickering”, Brunnhilde demanded, as she cut through a cluster of the aliens, “and focus on the fight before anybody gets hurt.”

“Sorry”, they apologized simultaneously and Loki actually meant it. It was one of many new sensations he came into feeling, since Sakaar and Hela and even sort of making up with the Avengers. Though his contriteness could be fear; the Valkyrie scared him a lot more than his brother.

“They’re too many!”, Sif called out, as they were backed against a wall.

“Where are the damn Warriors Three?”

“They should be here any moment”, she answered, though looking just as worried.

“No, Val, why would you need Pegasus”, Brunnhilde mocked the God of Thunder, as her back came against a stone wall. Loki looked up, it was too smooth to climb and besides, Follarians were winged creatures, able to fly, so unless Fandral, Hogun and Volstagg showed up with their ship, they’d be bird food.

Loki never wished more for Thor’s hammer, the one thing that could fly them out of here. But no, his evil killer sister had to ruin that. “We shouldn’t have let Bruce stay on earth”, Loki hissed over, as his back came up to the rock wall.

“Ifs, buts and whatnots will not help us out here”, Thor made clear, summoning all the lightning he could, but those damn things didn’t seem to mind the electricity all that much.

“I don’t want to die again”, Loki groaned and rolled his eyes, hoping that staying sarcastic might keep the fear at bay. It didn’t, but trying to pretend couldn’t hurt.

“Yes, one horrible play about your death was truly enough”, Thor shot back.

“I’m hurt!” Loki turned over to his brother. “You really didn’t like it?”

“LOKI!”

He turned around at his brother’s call and turned just in time to see a poisonous dart flying at him. Right, it wasn’t enough that those creatures could fly and had beaks harder than that shield of Captain America, no, they could also shoot darts from their wings.

Time seemed to slow down, as the dart came at him but, just before it hit his chest, Thor dove in front of him, like a human shield. He fell to the ground with an earth-shaking scream that even scared the birds into retreating a few metres, far enough that Loki could safely drop next to his brother. “Thor? You with me?”

“Yes”, he hissed through clenched teeth, “unless my idiot brother I do not die thrice a week.”

“Touchée.”

Sif and Brunnhilde jumped right in front of the brothers, as protective shield. In the meantime, Loki examined his brother as well as he could. The dart had lodged in his arm, already the surrounding skin was discoloured in a deep and unhealthy looking purple.

“Brother”, Loki tried to smile, “you saved my life. I never knew you cared.”

“Yeah, you did.” It clearly took Thor a lot to get the words out, his body stiffening and the purple mark slowly but steadily spreading.

“Finally!”, he heard Sif’s cry and looked up to see the Warriors Three flying up to them, guns blazing just enough for the birds to scatter and them to land right in front of the women.

“Someone help”, Loki called over, no way he could carry his brother. And he didn’t have to, the Three came running out and taking Thor inside the safety of the ship.

“You were right, brother”, Thor smiled weakly, as they took off. “We really should have brought Bruce with us.” With that, his eyes closed, and Thor drifted off.

Shit. “We need to get him help, now”, Brunnhilde urged Volstagg, who piloted the ship.

“Earth isn’t to far away”, he answered, “maybe their fantastic doctor can do something.”

“To the Avenger’s then.”

It wasn’t a long flight; it was however long enough for Loki to lose himself in his worry. Not outwardly, of course not. He had a reputation after all and was very keen on keeping his image intact.

But sure enough, his brother put his life on the line to safe Loki’s and that was something he didn’t know how to stomach. Sure, they had often fought side by side, but usually it was Loki who ‘died’ and not Thor. Using himself as a human shield? Who did that?

When they landed on the compound’s lawn, they were already awaited. It was very hectic, Loki did lose track of the situation for a moment. What he did get was that Thor was taken to the medbay where Bruce looked after him and the Asgardians hurrying after them. The Avengers held Loki back, demanding an explanation. They didn’t hide that they thought it was Loki who tried to kill Thor and well, in a way, they weren’t all that wrong.

But he caught them up on their fight against the Follarians, Thor being hit by a poison arrow and with Earth being the nearest planet where they had allies, they came here.

Eventually, one Avenger after the next walked away, some headed to the infirmary to check on Thor, some had to get back to work; in the end, Loki sat by himself in the living room. He should probably go check on his brother, but it was just so much easier to pretend not to care.

“Here.” Peter’s voice ripped him out of his thoughts and Loki looked up to see the child, handing him a cup of coffee. “You look like you could need it.”

“Thank you, Peter”, Loki smiled and gratefully took the cup and a deep sip. “It’s delicious.”

“Good.” He sat next to Loki on the couch and looked up with his big brown eyes. “I know you’re worried. You don’t have to pretend, if you don’t want to.”

Loki wasn’t sure what to say. Yes, he was deeply worried that his brother died because Loki lost focus during a battle and basically sacrificed himself for the younger brother. But it was just damn near impossible to actually verbalize his anxieties, so he just stared back at the kid and shrugged.

“Ok, so, are you just not worried or are you, but don’t know how to express it?”

Damn, that child was very intuitive. “The latter”, he eventually admitted, though it was barely more than a mumble.

“I’m worried, too.” Peter scooted closer to Loki’s side. “Do you want to go and check on him? I’ll be right by your side. And if you don’t want to, that’s ok, we can just stay here.”

“You are quite something, aren’t you, Peter?”, he smiled at the boy.

“Well…” His cheeks flushed, and he broke eye contact for a moment. “I’ve been learning a lot about dealing with anxiety; I’m actually seeing a therapist and she is helping me a lot. For example by laying out all the options that are before you right now, you’re forced to focus on the here and now. So, our options are to stay here and talk or we could go to the infirmary and see if Dr Bruce has any news already.”

“Wow.” Quietly, Loki pondered his options for a moment. Being up here would definitely be easier, just him and Peter, but he should probably go down there and look after his brother; after all he had looked out for Loki on the battlefield. “Let’s go.”

“Alright.” They walked there quietly and arrived in the infirmary just as Bruce came out of the treating room.

“Loki, hello”, the doctor greeted him with a friendly smile.

“Bruce. How is he?”

“He’ll be alright, we just need to get the poison out of his system, preferably with a blood transfusion.” The doctor looked at him expectantly, and Loki’s heart just sunk. He couldn’t even help his brother!

“I’m adopted, remember?”

“Yeah, but as far as I can tell, any Asgardian’s blood will do; his godly system functions wonderfully that way.”

“I’m also not Asgardian”, he stated, trying not to voice his hurt too much.

“Right…” Bruce flushed a little green in embarrassment and turned to the Asgardians. “Whoever is willing, please follow me.”

Naturally, all of them were willing to help safe their king and once again, Loki was alone.

“ARGH!” With a loud cry, Loki punched the concrete wall, slightly proud to have left a considerable hole.

“Hey.” A hand gently patted his shoulder. Damn him, he had forgotten Peter being just behind him.

“I’m alright”, he grumbled and took a few steps away from the child.

“No, you’re not.” He was quiet for a while, before talking again. “I never knew you weren’t Asgardian…”

“I’m a Frost Giant”, he explained, his voice unexpectedly calm and collected. “Odin fought my people, when I was just a baby. In his hubris, he took me with him, raised me to believe I was Asgardian and had the same rights to any throne and kingdom as my brother did. My real name is Loki Laufeyson, Prince of Jotunheim.” He turned to Peter, who had a small smile on his face. “What?”

“You still call Thor your brother.”

“Yeah, well...” Unsure what to answer to that, Loki just shrugged.

“And now it hurts that you can’t be the one to help him.”

“It’s more than that, though. He’s in there because of me.” Loki leaned against the wall, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “One of those warrior birds came at me, I realized it too late and Thor jumped in front of me, literally used himself as a human shield that I would not get hurt. And now he needs help and I cannot return that favour.”

“First of all, Thor knew what he was doing”, Peter made clear, as he took a few steps towards Loki. “Secondly, he loves you and wants you to be safe. But most importantly”, he put his hand on Loki’s shoulder, “you’re just as much his brother as he is yours. You guys will be alright.”

“Thank you Peter”, Loki smiled, and really meant it.

.

“Loki?” After quite a while, Bruce walked up to him and Peter, who had made themselves comfortable on a bench. “There’s a certain god of thunder who would like to see you.” He shot Loki a warm smile, that dropped as soon as he saw the hole in the wall.

“Great”, Peter chirped, before Bruce could start the questioning and pulled Loki to his feet. “Don’t worry, I’m right behind you”, he whispered, so Bruce couldn’t hear it. But if he did, he pretended not to and held the door open for the two.

“Brother!” Thor’s voice boomed through the room and with a wide grin, he held his arms out.

“He is on a lot of medication right now”, Bruce explained his affection.

“Man of Spiders? Huzzah, the bravest warrior of them all has come to join our celebrations!”

“A _lot_ of medication”, the doctor repeated with a shrug and bit down his grin.

“It is good to see you are still alive, brother”, Loki smiled as he walked up to the bed and patted Thor’s leg. Apparently, it wasn’t enough and Thor grabbed his arm and pulled Loki into a bonecrushing hug. Loki would have hugged back, if his arms weren’t caught between his and Thor’s chest. “You can let go of me now”, he choked out, when he got dangerously close to suffocation.

“Peter”, Thor exclaimed, let go of Loki and pulled Peter into a hug instead. Thankfully the boy had superhuman strength, or the doctor here would have another patient. “You have looked after Loki I assume?”

Loki rolled his eyes. Just because Thor was a few hundred years older than him…

“Nah, Loki can look after himself just well enough.”

“Technically”, Thor agreed, pulling his face into a complentative grimace. “The issue is, he has a tendency to fake his death when he does look after himself and I don’t want my brother to die anymore”, Thor pouted.

“That doesn’t mean that you have to die, though”, Loki stated. It was true; if he died, he was just dead, nothing to worry about. But if Thor died… Loki wasn’t sure he could live with himself if he’d let anything happen to his brother.

“How about you both just stop dying”, Peter suggested with a grin, knowing full well that Thor was currently too high on medication to see the fault in this idea.

Thor’s face just lit up and he grabbed the child by the shoulders. “HUZZAH! Peter is truly a genius.”

“Yeah, he is”, Loki just chuckled. “The absolute best.”

“Brother.” Thor turned to Loki and looked almost sober for a moment. “So are you.”


	6. Gunpoint

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Never before did Peter have to talk somebody down from taking their own life. What makes it so many times worse, is that he's currently trying to safe his classmate.

Having a gun pointed at his face really wasn't that new or unusual a sensation for Peter; it just came with the vigilante-job.

Having a gun pointed at his face by somebody his own age has sadly happened a few times as well.

But what Peter had never expected was being held at gunpoint by his classmate ,who was trying to kill himself.

“Just back off”, Nick growled at him.

“It's my job to protect everybody”, Spider-Man answered and Peter just fought with all he had to sound calm and not start crying at his classmate's 'intentions'. “Even those who don't think they want to be saved.”

“Who the fuck do you think you are to just presume what I have to be thinking?”, Nick yelled, waving his gun in front of Peter's face.

“Because I've been where you are”, Peter admitted quietly, a thought he had never before voiced out loud.

“Well, not everybody's got superpowers to pull them out that hole.”

Peter could argue that the intrusive thoughts didn't hit until the spiderbite and Uncle Ben, but that would only get Peter to break down and it wouldn't help either of them. “Would you tell me, why?”, he asked instead.

“What's it to you?”

“Tell you what, explain your reasoning and if it's a good enough reason, I'll let you be.” That was a risky game Peter proposed, but he was just some kid who saved cats from trees, stopped car thieves and maybe fought the occasional evil alien. But talking down someone suicidal? Peter was in way over his head. What else was he supposed to do though? There was nobody he could call without spooking Nick, who still had his gun pointed at Peter's face. And the slightest movement could push him to pull that trigger and Peter was honestly not sure if his spidersense was fast enough to get him out of this one...

“What kind of fucked up game are you trying to play?”, Nick cried out.

“No game. Just talk to me. What happened that makes you want to give up?”

The tears started streaming down Nick's face and Peter was endlessly glad that he wore a mask that concealed him tearing up as well. “I guess mainly my dad trying to beat the gay out of me.”

Oh fuck. “I... I'm so sorry.”

“Yeah, whatever. That good enough a reason? If not, well my Mum constantly threatens with kicking me out of the house and who I thought was my best friend is no longer talking to me, not since I came out to him. So, tell me, Spider-Man.” He took two steps towards Peter, the gun now mere centimetres away from his face. “What could possibly be there to live for?”

Peter took a deep breath, trying to calm himself instead of bursting out in tears “You're almost eighteen, almost graduated. If you bow out now, you're denying yourself the chance to ever be happy.”

“I couldn't give less of a fuck about happiness. I just want it to stop; I want everything to stop!” He took another step towards Peter and put the gun against Peter's forehead. “So, either you fuck off, or you'll go down with me.” There were no more tears in Nick's eyes, his face went hard, no sign of any emotion, not even the slightest bit of anger or fear.

“Do you really want to let your Dad win?”, Peter asked, trying to ignore the cold metal pressed against his face.

“He won long ago”, Nick shrugged. “You got five seconds.”

“I'm not going to leave you.”

“4...3...2...”

He didn't get further, as Nick was grabbed from behind. It took Peter a moment to realize Mr Stark and Mr Falcon had shown up.

“WHAT THE FUCK? LET ME GO!”, Nick yelled, kicking and trying everything to weasel out of the Falcon's grasp.

“It's gonna be alright, kid. You might not want to see it, but I promise you, it gets better”, Sam assured him.

“You don't know that!”, Nick cried, fighting with everything he had to get free, but to no avail.

“We can promise this, though”, Mr Stark made clear, “all the Avengers will fight for you to make sure that your Dad will pay for what he did to you.”

Nick's cries of anger turned into sobs as he stopped resisting and dropped the gun.

“Come on, kid. I can take you some place safe.” Sam loosened his grip on the teen and, with his arm around Nick's shoulder, they walked away and disappeared around a corner.

As soon as they were out of view, Peter felt all the strength drain from his body and he just dropped to the ground, letting the tears run wild. He ripped off his mask, maybe it would help him catch his breath again.

“It's alright, kid.” Tony's arm came around Peter's shoulder and pulled him close. “You're safe. And you've done well.”

“That's my classmate”, Peter eventually got out.

“Shit, Pete, I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine what that must feel like... All I can say is that you held your own impressively.”

Peter twisted in the embrace and looked up at his mentor. “How do you know? And how did you and Sam know to come?”

“KAREN sent an alert that you were being held at gunpoint. Pulled up your tracker and admittedly listened in. I grabbed Sam, since he's our resident expert on psychological issues and we came here. And no time to soon...” Tony brushed the unruly curls out of Peter's face, his thumb tracing over where only minutes ago the barrel of a gun had left its cold impression.

“You can be proud of yourself kiddo”, Tony smiled and pulled Peter back into a hug. “I know, I am.”


	7. Dragged Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever since Loki managed to get Bruce to hulk out on the helicarrier, the scene of Hulk dragging her to obviously her death plagues Natasha's dreams.

So, that was Loki's plan, get Bruce to hulk out. Nat wouldn't let that happen, if she had anything to do with it.

But she was too late. The green rage monster towered over her, growling at her, stepping towards her. All her tries to calm him were useless as he came closer, chasing her through the helicarrier and all she could do was run away.

But she was too slow. He grabbed her by the ankles and with a loud yell, she fell face first onto the metallic floor. In her desperation, Nat clawed at anything in reach, clawed at the floor; she didn't care that her nails chipped off, that her fingertips were bleeding, all she knew was that she had to get away from Hulk.

Mercilessly, he dragged her away, dragged her through the helicarrier. And Nat fought with everything she had, fought with every last ounce of her being for her life, to get away, to get to safety.

And then everything stopped. Hulk yanked on her feet one last time, turning her on her back, as he towered over her, with the most brutal grin Nat had ever seen.

“Bruce, no”, she whimpered, but Hulk had no mercy. He raised one arm high above his head. She looked up, locked eyes with him, trying to find a last shred of mercy; pleading, begging him to let her go. All she found in his eyes was cold, unbridled rage and hatred. And his fist came down on her face.

And that's when Nat woke up, shaking, shivering and completely soaked in sweat. It took her a moment to realize where she was, breathing hard she took a look around to find herself at the Avenger's in her room, not on the helicarrier but safely in her bed.

Not again.

Nat had lost count how many times this nightmare plagued her sleep; must have been almost every night over the past few weeks. There was only one thing that could help. She got up, wrapped a blanket tightly around her still shivering self and tiptoed into the dining room. Thankfully, Stark always had the bar stocked to the fullest. And if he noticed the conspicuous amounts of vodka disappearing lately, he didn't mention it.

She didn't have to bother with a glass; by the time she was ready to go to bed again, a bottle would be gone. So she sprawled herself out on a couch, made herself comfortable enough to drink herself into a dreamless sleep.

Halfway through the bottle, she heard steps getting closer, shuffling towards her. It only took her a few days of living with the other Avengers to recognize each of them by their walk and shit. The last person she would want to see right now, came shuffling in and tiredly and confusedly blinked a few times at her, as if he had a hard time realizing what he saw.

“Natasha?”, Bruce eventually mumbled.

“Hi.”

“What are you doing up at 3am?”

“Could ask you the same thing.”

“Fair enough”, he chuckled, poured himself a glass of whiskey neat, and motioned to sit next to her on the couch.

Nat just jumped up, and staggered a few steps away from him, silently cursing herself for being so clumsy and cowardly.

“Uh.” He looked at her with big eyes. “Are you alright?”

“Yes.” She caught herself again, at least something her training had been good for and sat herself in a chair. She wasn't a scared little girl who just ran off when there was danger around. But, she also didn't need to share a couch with the guy who she just dreamed about murdering her...

“Ok...” He sat himself on the couch, looking clearly uncomfortable, and in silence, they worked on their drinks.

“You know, there are glasses”, Bruce eventually remarked, with a side eye to the bottle.

“I'm Russian.”

“Right.”

Even though, Nat had half a bottle of vodka and Bruce only a glass of whiskey they finished their drinks at around the same time.

“Well”, the doctor cleared his throat, clearly uncomfortable with the silence, “I guess I'll try for a bit of sleep.”

“Yeah, me too.” Natasha had by now a nice buzz going. She could still walk a straight line, didn't slur her words, but that warm, fuzzy feeling enveloped her brain, her stomach, and she even managed to shoot Bruce a small smile as she walked past him. “Good night.”

Sleep took her quickly after that; a dreamless sleep without any giant green hands dragging her away, dragging her to her death. A bottle of vodka wasn't the healthiest thing in the world, but definitely the best solution for a crappy situation. And, as long as it worked, there was no need for Natasha to bother with anything else.


	8. Isolation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who says that Isolation's bad? It's definitely easier than having to be around the other Avengers

It was late at night; a time Bucky cherished most throughout the day. Everybody was asleep and he had his peace and quiet. Of course, he was over the moon to be no longer brainwashed and part of the Avenger family, but readjusting to an almost normal life…

What he remembered of his youth, his childhood, the time before he fell, was just not really tangible. Yes, he remembered playing stickball with Steve and Morita, cutting Rebecca's ponytails off and getting into all sort of trouble, but it somehow didn’t feel real. Any sort of memory felt unreal; a side-effect of Hydra’s indoctrination techniques. It was in a way quite positive; Bucky dreaded the day memories of his Winter Soldier days came back to him. It definitely was simple, he just was. There was nobody around him, he just functioned the way he was built to.

Being isolated was so much easier than being part of a group. Yes, he trusted his mind enough to be around people, to be part of society again; he trusted himself enough not to turn into a mindless killing machine. But wouldn’t it be easier to just be left in his room until there was a mission?

It was curious in a way; he thought he remembered himself to be quite sociable, at least he used to be, once upon a time. And Steve was trying hard to get that Bucky back, the Buck that he knew all these years ago. But how was Bucky supposed to explain to him that he didn’t even remember who that person was? It felt like an impossible task to verbalize all these overwhelming, existential questions: Who was he, really?

Why wouldn’t they just let him stay in his isolation? There he was safe, there he didn’t need to be, didn’t have to exist.

And then steps came closer. Buck jumped off the couch, landing almost silently and holding his hands out defensively.

“Chill, it’s just me”, Nat announced, quietly appearing from out the shadows.

“What are you doing up?”, he grumbled, annoyed that his alone-time had been interrupted.

“Could ask you the same thing”, she shot back, grabbed a bottle from the minibar and a glass. “Want a drink?”

“No thanks.” He dropped back on the couch, hoping she’d take the hint and leave him by himself.

She didn’t, unfortunately. “If you don’t want to drink, why do you come here?” She poured herself a glass and dropped down opposite him, in full on interrogation mode.

“What’s it to you?”

“Dude, it’s 2.47am. We both clearly have issues, otherwise we wouldn’t be sitting here and I just want to, I don’t know, understand what makes you tick.”

“I thought we knew each other from before all this Avengers business?” She had accused him of not giving a shit, but he really didn’t remember her. Maybe it would come back to him eventually.

“Yes, but that was Hydra Bucky, the brainwashed robot. As hard as I try, I just can’t read you.” She kept her eyes locked to his as she took a sip. “I assume you aren’t the sweet nerdy boy, Steve keeps telling stories about, either.”

Bucky stayed silent, but he held her stare.

“Alright.” She repositioned herself and leaned back. “I got it.”

“Aha?” he honestly doubted it, but wouldn’t deny her the chance to be wrong.

“You don’t want to be.”

Uh, what now? How… How did she get that?

“I assume from your shocked expression that I hit bull’s eye”, Nat smirked and finished her glass.

“How?”

“Takes one to know one”, she shrugged, put her glass down and disappeared again.

.

It was a few nights later, when she walked in on his alone-time again, poured herself a glass and sat herself opposite against him.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“Nope.”

“Alright.”

They sat together in silence, a game that repeated itself over the next few days, until Bucky’s curiosity won.

“Takes one to know one, huh?”, he mentioned as she had finished half her glass.

“Wondered, when you’d bring it up”, she grinned and turned to him. “I know you don’t remember it, but I went through pretty much the same you did. So yeah, I get it.”

“Get what exactly?”

After a deep breath, Nat answered: “I get the appeal, the safety of isolating yourself.”

“Oh.” Silence fell back over the room, only broken by the sound of Nat refilling her glass and for the first time he bothered enough to look at what she had. Vodka; should have expected that, she was Russian after all.

“How’d you get over it?”

“Clint”, she smiled, “he pulled me out, showed me that we don’t just fight for the fight’s sake.”

“Huh.”

“You can be lucky to have Steve”, she continued, “he won’t give you up, just like Clint never gave up on me. We need those people who still believe in the good, to balance out the numbness and isolation”, she shrugged.

That was all a bit much to swallow in the middle of the night.

“But, for starters, a silent drinking buddy at 3am will do”, she winked and patted his leg before getting up and disappearing as silently as she came.

Yeah, Bucky was sure that it would do just perfectly.


	9. Stabwound

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve hated Aliens. Especially the kind that rammed their swords through his side.

For the record, Steve hated Aliens. Not the movies, he hadn’t seen them yet, so couldn’t form a proper opinion. No, Steve talked about the beings from outer space, coming to try and take over earth. Couldn’t they just leave them alone?

“On your left!”, Sam shouted, before flying past Steve and punching another purple person wearing heaving armour, that reminded Steve of that of a medieval knight.

And three more lined themselves up in front of Steve, ready to kill him if necessary. Well, so was he and the punching and fighting continued. It was honestly a mess, arrows and bullets whooshed through the air, Tony, Sam and Wanda flew around and every now and then Scott showed up, before shrinking down again.

In all this mess it should be excusable that Steve didn’t realize the guy coming up behind him, or was it a woman? Steve honestly couldn’t tell. In any case, Steve didn’t realize them until it was too late, until they had rammed their sword through Steve’s side.

“AAAAH!” With a loud cry, he dropped to the ground and just managed to knock the Alien out with his shield, before they could deliver the fatal blow.

“Cap, you alright?”

“I don’t think so…” Steve answered through clenched teeth, trying to breathe through the pain shooting through his entire body. He looked down his side, where a giant stain grew on his suit and blood trickled out from where the sword had pierced the fabric. Shit, that was a lot of blood…

“I got him”, Sam called and only moments landed next to him. “Shit. Yeah, he’s done for today and needs a doctor, like right now.”

Steve tried to argue, but the pain was almost unbearable. Instead, he focused on not moving too much, as Tony landed on his other side. “Fuck! Buddy, are you alright?”

The pissed-off look Steve shot Tony should suffice as an answer.

“I’ll fly him to the compound. FRI, get the medbay ready. Wilson, you’re in charge.” With that, Tony scooped Steve up into his arms, bridal style, and before Steve could argue, they were airborne. It probably wasn’t a bad idea, Steve felt all dizzy and just closed his eyes in Tony’s arms.

“Oh, no, you’re not gonna sleep, Rogers!” Tony sounded almost worried, but there was no need to be; Steve was a supersoldier after all.

“You’re not my boss”, he mumbled his response, without opening his eyes.

“I mean, technically, you survive off my money. If I’m not your boss, that’d make me your sugar daddy…”

“Fine.” Steve fought to open his eyes again and glanced at Tony, who looked down with a smile. “Good boy.”

Moments later they reached the compound and Tony put Steve down on a bed. “Dr Cho is the boss now, you’re gonna listen to what she has to say.”

“Ok”, Steve nodded and reached out for Tony, as he stepped away from the bed and grabbed his hand. It was weirdly wet, but Steve was too out of it to give it any thought. “Can I sleep now?”

He didn’t wait for an answer, couldn’t wait for one. His eyelids were heavier than steel and dropped down, as everything washed away into darkness.

.

Steve woke up to two feet draped over his and the radio playing. He turned over to see who was sitting by his side. “Buck?”

“Hey punk”, he grinned. “I can't leave you alone, can I?”

Steve just rolled his eyes and rolled back into the pillow and took a moment to look around. He was in a hospital room, had a bunch of tubes running in and out of his arm and his side hurt like nobody's business. Right, the fight, the aliens and being impaled by a sword came back to him.

“It feels like some really weird flashback or deja-vu”, Bucky chuckled.

“Tell me about it... But as long as you're sitting there, I'll get through it.”

“Ugh, you sappy punk.” Buck rolled his eyes before shooting him the widest grin. “Now, rest up and get better, so I can kick you ass for being irresponsible.”

“Yes sir”, Steve chuckled and happily dozed off again.

  
  



	10. Stabwound

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When it comes to Clint, Nat just can't help but think with her emotions. It might be a good thing though, because if she weren't batshit insane, her plan to save him probably never would work...  
(NCIS:LA fans might recognize this scene ;))

The fight was not that big a deal. The baddie of the week might have been quite the strategist, but all that was useless against the livid Avengers and especially Natasha's rage. That's just what you got for taking one of their own.

“Where is he?”, Nat demanded to know, bringing her foot down on his chest.

“Who cares”, he chuckled, “he's dead anyways.”

Putting more force on his chest, Nat couldn't deny the spark of satisfaction, when she heard a rip cracking.

“You're gonna kill me one way or another”, he groaned, blood trickling down his face.

“I can make it very painful for you though... Besides, I don't know if you can tell with that shiner, but your guys are getting their asses handed to them.” She gestured over at where the rest of the Avengers took care of the evil minions.

“Fine...” he grumbled with the rroll of an eye and half-heartedly nodded towards a shack. “He's in there.”

Nat didn't miss the grin on his face, but she was to worried to question hom further about what was most definitely a trap.

“Don't let him go!”, she yelled in the general direction of her teammates and ran towards the building.

“Clint? You in there?”, she called out as she got close.

“Tasha?” Oh thank the heavens, he was alive.

“Yeah, it's me, I got you”, she answerd as she burst through the – unlocked – door.

“DON'T MOVE!”, he cried out and Nat stilled right away.

“What's going on?”

Clint was on the far end of the empty room, standing there unmoving, sweat dripping off his face.

“Switch off the lights.”

“Alright...” She complied, flipped the switch and saw right away what he meant: laser beams went criss-cross all through the room, keeping Clint in a sort of invisible prison.

“They're connected to explosives. Cross one of the beams and we both blow up. So, just get out of here, because I think I'm ready to faint any moment now.”

“No, you're not. Just, don't move and I'll get Stark and he can...”

“Nat, please. I can't...” His voice broke off; Nat knew him well enough to know that it took all he had to keep it together, undoubtedly for her benefit. “So, unless you have a solution, just get yourself to safety.”

“I'm not giving up on you, Clint”, she made clear and inched closer towards the nearest beam.

“Shit, don't move, please!”, he begged.

“It's alright”, Nat assured him. As calmly as she could, she assessed the situation. Fuck, normally she could just shut down that panicky voice and go about her missions emotionless. But not where Clint was concerned. He was the one person she valued more than every single mission she had ever been on.

So. Was her plan highly emotional? Admittedly, yes. Was it bat-shit crazy? More like downright insane.

“Do you trust me?” As close to the beam as she dared to get, Nat locked eyes with Clint.

“Always, you know that”, he nodded tiredly.

“Right then.” There was just enough horizontal space between the beams for Nat to hold out her hand and with a weak smile, Clint grabbed hers.

“You're fucking insane.”

“Let's be glad, otherwise this might not work”, she grinned. “On three. 1...2...3!”

With two big steps, they jumped out the door. Nat pulled Clint behind her and braced herself for the explosion. They were barely out the door, when a loud bang dent them flying and left her ears ringing as she crashed on the ground. Clint landed somewhat half on top of her.

“Clint? You alright?”, Nat asked, once the noise died down and she was sure she hadn't died.

“Uuuh... I think so”, he groand and rolled off her.

“NAT? THE FUCK?” Stark landed right next to them. “CLINT! You're alive!”

“Yeah, I think so...”

“Never doubted it”, Tony grinned as he pulled them to their feet. “You're like a cockroach; couldn't kill you if I wanted to.”

“I think that's a compliment”, Clint decided, leaning on Stark for support.

“Whatever makes you feel better, buddy.”


	11. Asphyxiation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You're losing your touch there, old man”, Nat observed, as Clint managed to drop Steve on his behind with barely breaking a sweat.
> 
> “She's right”, Clint agreed, “this was way to easy. You alright?”
> 
> “I don't get sick.” Steve took the outstretched hand puling him to his feet. “Super Soldier, remember?” Admittedly, he had felt a little off all day, everything seemed to be a bit slower his movements, his breathing... Come to thing of it, especially his breathing.

“You're losing your touch there, old man”, Nat observed, as Clint managed to drop Steve on his behind with barely breaking a sweat.

“She's right”, Clint agreed, “this was way to easy. You alright?”

“I don't get sick.” Steve took the outstretched hand puling him to his feet. “Super Soldier, remember?” Admittedly, he had felt a little off all day, everything seemed to be a bit slower his movements, his breathing... Come to thing of it, especially his breathing.

Nat walked up to him, looking Steve up and down. “You do look quite pale. And feel hot”, she added, after putting her hand on his forehead.

“Well thank you, I try my best”, Steve tried to grin, but the quick spar with Barton really left him breathless.

“That's it”, she decided. “You”, she pointed at Steve, “sit yourself down. You”, she gestured at Clint, “get Bruce down here and I'll make the tea.”

As the two left Steve by himself, he pondered his options. The safest route was listening to Natasha, if only because she would use all her brute strength to get Steve to relax. And he was in no position to fight her on that; but then again he wouldn't really stand a chance against her if he were feeling perfectly well.

It was no real question what to do; there was only one thing he could do; he had to do: this thing was heating up faster than he had predicted; he had to get the plane down before it all blew up. Even if it meant that he would miss his dance with Peggy...

He hadn't breached the surface of the water yet, but he already could barely breath. All Steve could hope for was that the crash would kill him before he would drown.

Of course, he had no such luck. The plane went down and everything went dark as the cabin filled with water, the icy waves engulfing him almost immediately. Steve took one last desperate breath, before he was underwater.

His body fought against the restriction, against the water pressing down, crushing his chest and lungs. All instincts called, urged for Steve to take a breath, begging for a gasp of air. Fear and panic overcame him; he wanted to scream and fight, but nothing. He was pinned down, unable to move as the last bit of air was sucked out from his lungs and everything around him went dark.

_Well, at least I'll be with my Mum and Buck again..._

***

“SHIT!”

“Damnit, Clint, you said he was a little off”, Bruce yelled, as the two men ran to the unconscious Captain, lying in the middle of the training room.

“He was more or less alright when we left him” ,Clint defended himself. “He was a bit pale, a little warm but that was it!”

“By now he's burning up and barely breathing.” Bruce held a thermometer against Steve's forehead. “104.4. We need to cool him down. Right now.”

“Oh fuck, you're not thinking...” Clint's stomach dropped to some very uncomfortable places at the pure thought of the trauma they were about to put their friend through...

“104.7”, Bruce urged and grabbed a hold of Steve's arms. “It's either this or a Super Soldier funeral.”

“Damnit”, Clint groaned, grabbed Steve's feet and together they carried the Captain away.

***

Icy waves crashed against Steve's skin, engulfing him. No, no, no, no, he didn't... He fought tooth and nail and eventually managed to break through the water's surface, spluttering and gasping for air. Not again, no, never again!

He cried out, screamed in terror, tried to get away, to safety, but he couldn't. He was being held down, pushed under the icy water, destined to forever be frozen.

As hard as Steve fought, he couldn't escape the grasp on him, but he would not give up. He could do this all day, even though the walls around him seemed to be closing in and all the oxygen was being sucked from his lungs. He would go down fighting, with his dying breath if he had to.

But, just as Steve braced himself for that final gasp, he was lifted up, still held tightly. No longer in the icy water though, instead in a warm blanket, pressed against somebody's chest.

“What's going on?” Steve's question unfortunately came out more as a breathless whimper than the demanding tone he was trying for.

“You're alright”, a voice kept on assuring him, “you're safe.”

Steve had a hard time placing the voice but it seemed trustworthy enough for him to stop resisting.

“There you go...” The chest Steve had his back against, rumbled with a hearty laugh. “America's Captain shall soon again be back to his fighting ways.”

Steve was half pushed half pulled to what turned out to be a bed. “Just breath”, he was being encouraged, and Steve tried his all to take deep breaths, it was all shallow though; at least enough for him not to be drowning anymore.

“It's alright, Steve. You're safe, just rest.”

Well, if the voice said that... He leaned back on the bed, wrapping the blanket tightly around his still very cold body and soon enough drifted off into dreamless darkness.

.

As he came to again, he was surrounded by his very concerned looking Avengerfriends. “Uhm... hi”, he mumbled, when he was more sure than not that he was not hallucinating.

“Hey, Steve!” Nat turned to him with a wide smile. “How are you feeling?”

Good question. Steve took a moment and tried to process his current feelings. “Cold...”

“Yeah, sorry about that”, Clint patted his arm with a contrite look in his eyes. “You were burning up, had to cool you down, buddy.”

“Not gonna lie, Cap, you had us worried for a moment there...”, Tony admitted.

Steve couldn't help but crack a weak smile at that. “You, worried about me? There really is a first time for everything, huh?”

“Yeah”, he snorted a laugh, “but as long as you don't turn this”, Tony gestured at him, “into a regular thing, everything should be able to go back to normal.”

“Alright, then.” Steve let his eyelids drop again. He was way to exhausted to deal with his angsting friends right now, especially since breathing seemed to be a foreign concept to his lungs at the moment. It all gave Steve some wonderful flashbacks to a time about eighty years ago... Him, lying sick and barely breathing in a bed, with his family and friends around him looking worried; he basically spent the first 20-something years of his life like that and had actually thought that phase of his life to be over once he got Stark's serum...

He must have dozed of again; the next time Steve opened his eyes, all the guys were gone, only Clint was still there, sprawled out over a chair, his mouth gaping open as he – not softly – snored. On the chair on his other side sat Bruce, seemingly more or less awake.

“Bruce?”, Steve croaked, barely getting anything out.

It seemed to be enough though; the doctor stirred, opened his eyes and smiled widely at Steve. “Hey, you're up! How are you feeling?”

“Thirsty. And... Can't breathe...”

“Ah, you'll be alright”, Bruce assured him and came over to help Steve sitting up in his bed and handed him a glass of water. “Wake up”, he scoffed at Clint and chucked a pillow at the sleeping man.

“HUA!” Clint jumped up, landing in a fighting pose, looking around the room with wild eyes, before spotting Steve. “Hey buddy, you're up!”

“What...” Trying to talk was a bit too much right now, so he just gestured at Clint, hoping that at least one of them would get it.

“There's a rooster for Steve duty”, Bruce explained. “I think every two hours there's a switch and Thor is due to relieve Clint of his chore soon. Not that he had worked all that hard”, Bruce added with a scoff and Clint just raised his eyebrow at him.

“And you?”

“I'm on an alternating schedule with Dr Cho”, he explained. “Wanna know what's wrong with you or go back to sleep?”, Bruce asked after a moment of silence and Steve just nodded. “Well, you were poisoned.”

Awesome. With a groan, Steve fell back against his pillow. “Never done that before...”

“Gets old after a while”, Clint shrugged and Steve was happy to ignore this questions-raising and worrying statement.

“It went to attack your lungs. Your enhanced everything tried to fight through it at top speed, which is why you were alright one moment and burning up at 105 degrees the next...”

Steve wasn't sure how much of this he actually grasped and doubted he would remember more than half of it the next day, but he just gestured for Bruce to continue the story, when Thor walked into the room.

“Captain, you are awake! That is wonderful news!”

“Hi”, he smiled weakly and half-heartedly waved at the god.

“We were just telling him what happened”, Clint updated Thor, before turning back to Steve. “As you can imagine we needed to cool you down as fast as possible. Muscle-Man over here took care of you actually staying in the water.”

“You are truly a worthy fighter”, Thor boomed, “even whilst unconscious, you forced all my strength.”

“Sorry 'bout that.”

“No, never apologize for being a warrior; it was an honour.”

“Alright, you know, that doesn't really matter all that much right now. Thor and Bruce are here with you, so really nothing can happen to you and just get some more rest”, Clint threw in, probably realizing that all this was overwhelming Steve just enough to border on unbearable.

“Thanks guys”, Steve smiled before letting his eyes close again. “You really are the best.”


End file.
